Damaged for Him Read online

  DAMAGED FOR HIM

  For Him: Book Three

  Marissa Farrar

  Table of Contents

  Title Page

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-one

  Chapter Twenty-two

  Chapter Twenty-three

  Chapter Twenty-four

  Chapter Twenty-five | Four Months Later

  Chapter Twenty-six

  Prologue

  One

  About the Author

  Also by the Author

  Chapter One

  I couldn’t get the image of Angelo’s face out of my head. His expression of utter helplessness, fury, and anguish when I’d been taken broke my heart in two.

  I didn’t want to forget him. How could I? He was the boy I’d been in love with since my childhood, and yet deep down, I knew I needed to at least try. I was no longer Kitty—the girl on the run with Angelo Cassidy, and who was dreaming of a future with him. Now I was Catalina again, the girl who’d been sold at the age of ten, and who now belonged to Elliot Torres.

  I stared at the back of Torres’s head in the passenger seat as we drove. His shiny, thick, black hair was dead straight, unlike Angelo’s messy waves. He was physically bigger, too, his shoulders broader, and was at least a couple of inches taller. Plus, he had more than ten years age difference on Angelo.

  One of his men drove the car, while another sat beside me in the rear seat. I held my body rigid, not wanting any part of my anatomy to brush against the arm or thigh of this stranger beside me. He kept the button of his jacket undone and flipped back slightly at the hip, exposing the butt of the gun in its holster.

  I was hugely aware that each of these men had just witnessed what Torres had done to me, how he’d held me with his arm around my throat, while his other hand pushed into my pants. They’d all watched as he shoved his fingers inside me and forced an orgasm from me, despite me trying to stop my body from reacting. I hated that. I hated that he could eke a sickening kind of pleasure from me, even when I didn’t want it. I hated that all these men had watched me unravel, had seen me at my most vulnerable. And more than anything, I hated how Torres held that power over me, and that he’d used it to hurt Angelo. To teach him a lesson in what was his.

  Where Angelo had set me free, now I forced myself to close off my emotions for him, like rolling a boulder back over the entrance of a cave. It was the only way I was going to get through this. Torres fingering me in front of Angelo was only the start. I knew I had far worse ahead, and if I allowed myself to mourn and grieve for Angelo, it would only make things harder. I needed to follow Yolanda’s lead and accept my fate with some kind of dignity.

  Still, a nugget of hope settled in my heart—hope that this wasn’t it for good, and Angelo would find some way of getting me back. I wondered what would happen to him now. Would his father hurt him? Would he send him away? At least the master had protected Angelo from Torres.

  I mentally corrected myself. Silas Cassidy wasn’t my master any longer—Elliot Torres was. Making that kind of mistake in front of Torres would see me punished.

  Silas Cassidy’s words to me on that final night in the compound rang in my ears... There are rumors about that man—rumors I wasn’t aware of when I initially sold you to him—and I’m concerned that you may be shocked by some of his... fetishes.

  I had no idea what those fetishes might be, but I was certain in the coming days I would find out.

  My attention was drawn once again to the matte black of the gun in the holster of the man sitting beside me. My fingers itched at the idea of lunging for the gun, of yanking it out of the holster before the man was able to react. The rear doors of the car were locked, but if I could shoot all the men, I could climb through the front.

  But then what? Where would I go? Back to the compound, to try to find Angelo? I wasn’t even sure I’d be able to find the compound again, and would I really be able to survive out in the real world alone, with no money and no companion?

  Besides, it was a pipe dream. There was no way I could overpower three men on my own. I doubted I’d even be able to snatch the gun without receiving an elbow in the face for my attempt.

  “Are you looking forward to seeing your new home, Catalina?” Torres called out from the passenger seat. “I’m afraid we have some distance to travel, but I hope you’ll like it when we get there.”

  I pressed my lips together, not answering him, and stared at my hands clasped together in my lap. My face still stung from where he had slapped me. The threat of violence was very real, and I feared that even more than I feared the sexual violence. Sex was something I’d been around my whole life. It was what I’d always known my path in life would be. I’d grown up surrounded by women who provided sex for male visitors, and up until a few days ago, I hadn’t considered the possibility of there being any other option for me. But then Angelo had convinced me to run, and he’d opened up the door in my mind that told me there was a chance of a different future. Only that had been a dream, and I needed to close that door again. This was my life now, and there was no point in fighting it. Fighting would only get me killed.

  I heard Angelo’s voice in my head. Don’t fight him. Don’t make him angry... don’t ever feel that I’ll think of what he does to you as a betrayal of your love for me, because it won’t be. It’ll just be you doing what you need to in order to stay safe.

  I wanted to be able to think that way, but Torres touching me did feel like I was betraying Angelo, no matter what he said. Even though I didn’t want it, my body had taken pleasure from it, and that felt like the worst kind of betrayal—a betrayal to myself.

  I turned my head to look out of the window, blinking back tears as we continued to drive. Every minute took me farther away from Angelo. Would he know where I was being taken? I had no idea, and I couldn’t decide if I wanted him to or not. If he knew, I thought he would try to do something to save me, only that would most likely get him killed. Torres had allowed him to live, despite his transgression with me, as a favor toward the relationship he had with Angelo’s father, but I doubted he’d do the same a second time around. I couldn’t stand the idea of Angelo putting his life at risk, even if it was for me. At least if I knew he was alive out there somewhere, I could imagine him safe and happy, but if he was dead, I wasn’t sure I’d want to go on myself.

  I watched the signs for towns and cities and different interstates pass by, but I didn’t recognize any of the names. I had no idea where any of these places were or where we were going. I doubted there was much point in asking either. Even if Torres did tell me, it wouldn’t mean anything to me. My utter lack of experience in the real world meant I had nothing to tie anywhere to.

  Hours passed by, but we didn’t stop for a break. Even the guy next to me started to shift around in his seat, needing to stretch out.

  “We’re getting close,” Torres said from the passenger seat. “You can put the blindfold on her now.”

  I realized he was talking about me, and my stomach lurched. “No, no. You don’t need to do that.”

  The man who’d been sitting beside me twisted slightly in his seat and shrugged as though to say he didn’t really care
what I thought. He pulled a satin material blindfold from his pocket—one side in a deep purple, and the other black—and leaned over to me.

  My heart pounded. I didn’t want to be sitting in the dark. But there was nowhere I could go, and there was no point in fighting. I’d be wearing the blindfold whether I wanted to or not.

  I sat still, my head bent, while he slipped the satin over my eyes, plunging me into darkness, and tied a knot at the back of my head. I sensed him move away from me again, settling back into his seat, but I remained in the same position.

  No longer able to see where we were going, I remained motionless as the car moved around me. I sensed we’d slowed, and I was forced to lean from one side to the other as we took bends. From outside the car, I heard sirens and car horns, and instinctively knew we’d left the seemingly endless highways and had entered a more built-up area—a town or even city.

  My heart ached for Angelo. Every second he wasn’t beside me felt like a hole growing bigger in my heart. I never knew it was possible to miss someone with a physical ache, but I did.

  The car slowed to a stop, and I heard a metallic grinding before we got going again. Not for long, though, as the car halted once more, and this time the engine fell quiet around me. Hands touched the back of my head, and I flinched, but the blindfold was removed from my eyes. I blinked in the sudden light.

  “We’re here,” Torres said, twisting in his seat to face me.

  I looked around, taking in where we’d ended up. We’d driven through a set of automatic gates that were now closed behind us, and in front of me was the place I’d be calling home.

  The single story, white house before me was huge—even bigger than the one at the compound, though it didn’t have any of the converted rooms that housed the women. It was all hard lines, and blocky wings made of concrete and glass. Some kind of glass structure rose from the back, though I had no idea what it contained.

  The car door beside me opened, and Torres offered his hand to help me. I’d been so transfixed by the sight of the house that I hadn’t even noticed him getting out. My limbs were stiff and cramped, and I wanted nothing more than a hot bath or shower and a change of clothes. I eyed his hand mistrustfully, and he beckoned me with his fingers.

  “Come on, now, Catalina. Be a good girl.”

  I didn’t want to be a good girl—not for him—but I didn’t have much choice. I took his hand, his skin warm and dry, and allowed him to help me from the back of the car. We stood together beside the vehicle, the property looming over us.

  Torres frowned down at me, his lips and brow pinched. “You understand that your actions have changed my plans for you here? I’d dreamed of bringing you home and treating you like a princess before I took what was mine, but since someone has already taken that virtue, I’m afraid I’ve also had to alter things to fit the situation.”

  My cheeks burned hot, and I glanced to the ground. “I understand.”

  “I had also lowered my expectations of you according to your inexperience, but now I know that’s not the case. It seems you have had plenty of experience over the last week or so. Therefore, I won’t be treating you with kid gloves, Catalina. You’re not some unspoiled, young virgin any longer.”

  I nodded. “Yes, sir.”

  My mind was spinning, trying to figure out what he might have planned for me. Did he still want to keep me for himself, or did he plan on putting me to work like Yolanda and the other women back in the compound? I wasn’t sure what would be worse...

  “In which case,” Torres said with a smile, “welcome to your new home.”

  Chapter Two

  Any trouble I caused, Catalina would be made to pay.

  That was the only thing stopping me from losing my fucking mind right now. I’d never experienced such rage, but instead of letting my fists fly, I channeled it deep down, knowing I needed to be smarter if I was ever going to get Catalina back.

  We drove through the gates and into the compound. My guts twisted at the sight of the place. I’d believed I was done here, and I would never have to see it again, but now I was back, and not only that, I was now a prisoner. I had taken Catalina’s place.

  If I got a gun and jammed the muzzle up under my father’s chin, would he tell me where Torres had taken her? No, I knew him too well. He’d laugh and tell me to do it, knowing full well that I wouldn’t. If I killed him, I might never find out where she was. America was a big place, and she could be anywhere. Torres might have even taken her out of the country, though I hoped her lack of ID would at least help us in this case. Of course, Torres might have gotten a passport done for her, for all I knew. If she was out of the country, my chances of finding her would be slim to none.

  No, I needed to play it cool, no matter how I felt inside. My father would be suspicious of me. He knew me well enough to understand that I wouldn’t just let this go. Maybe a week ago he would have thought his hold over me was enough to make me obey him, but I’d proven it wasn’t when I’d taken Catalina’s virginity and run with her from the compound.

  Silas stopped the car and twisted in his seat to address me.

  “You’ll be staying with me here for the foreseeable future,” he told me. “The apartment in the city is no longer yours. The car you used to drive is no longer yours. Everything you had in your life now belongs to me.” He thought for a moment and added, “Except for Catalina, of course. She belongs to Torres.”

  I balled my fists and gritted my teeth. “Yes, Father.”

  “I’m glad we’re on the same page with this one. Do not betray me again, Angelo. I know you’re probably thinking you’ll find a way to get Catalina back right now, but I suggest you let that thought go. You’ll only get her hurt by refusing to let her go. Prove to me that you can be trusted, and I’ll consider allowing you to have your life back. But until that day comes, you’ll remain here with me at the compound. Understand?”

  “Yes, Father,” I growled again, though I had no intention of complying. I had only one goal in my life, and that was to release Catalina from Torres’s grip. Even if I died doing it.

  Together, we climbed out of the car.

  The women emerged from their rooms, eyes bright with concern and curiosity.

  Shame washed over me. I didn’t want them to see my return. They’d all know what had happened by now—that I’d tried to run with Catalina—and by seeing me here without her by my side, they’d know I had failed. It was ridiculous that I was allowing my pride to be hurt when Catalina was going through so much worse, but that was how I felt.

  I caught Yolanda’s eye as she watched me from the open doorway of her room. Her arms were folded across her chest, her lips pressed together in a thin line, her nostrils flared. There were so many questions in her dark gaze, but I couldn’t answer any of them now. Yolanda had warned me that no good would come of Catalina and me getting together, but I’d ignored her advice and taken her anyway. Now I was back with my tail between my legs, and Catalina had been claimed by an angry Torres. I tormented myself with what he might be doing to her—fuck, it wasn’t even a “might.” I knew exactly what he would be doing to her, and it made me want to reach inside my chest and tear out my heart.

  But Yolanda wanted to know if Catalina was all right, and I at least needed to give her that. The older woman had raised Catalina as though she were her own, and she deserved to know she was okay, at least in the physical sense of the word.

  Despite my own shame, I forced myself to hold Yolanda’s eye and shook my head briefly to tell her I couldn’t speak to her right now.

  Yolanda exhaled a long breath, clutched her hand to her chest, and turned away from me.

  I’d fill her in on the details once my father had taken his eye off me. To be honest, I wouldn’t be telling her purely for her own knowledge. I wanted to speak with her because even though she disagreed with what I’d done—or at least had attempted to do—she was on my side. She may berate me for my choices, but she’d also listen to my heartbreak.
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  Standing outside one of the other doors, I caught the eye of the blonde who’d gone down on me around the back of the house, the same day Torres had been here with Catalina.

  Bianca.

  Her lips curled in a knowing smile, her eyebrows lifting above blue eyes lined with kohl. At least, it seemed, one person was pleased to see me back, though I was going to do my best to stay far away from her. The woman was trouble, and I already had enough of my own shit to deal with.

  “Inside,” my father barked at me. “Now.”

  I hated being ordered around like a child, but I took my anger and forced it deep down. Throwing a temper tantrum wasn’t going to help anyone right now, and especially not Catalina. I needed to get my father to trust me again. It was the only way I’d be able to access his office when he wasn’t there. I was certain I’d find something in there to tell me where Catalina was. He’d have paperwork or a file on his computer, or even an address book containing Elliot Torres’s contact details. Even if it didn’t have an actual address, there might be a landline phone number, and I’d be able to trace the area code, which would at least give me some idea of where to start looking for her.

  I’d never been in the compound when Catalina wasn’t here, too, apart from when I’d been very young, and I barely remembered those years. She’d been as much a part of this place as the walls of the house, and it was strange to think her presence no longer blessed this place. It was as though she’d been the one little flicker of light and joy, the one thing that had made people smile through all the exploitation and violence. But now she was no longer here, and it was as though the entire place felt her loss. Even the women seemed dulled and hollowed out, as though they’d lost their spark.

  I followed Silas Cassidy through the house. He didn’t want the others to hear what he had to say to me, or perhaps he didn’t want them to hear what I might have to say to him. Either way, he left both his men and the other women behind, and when we reached his office, he unlocked it before allowing me through and slamming the door behind us.